The Culprit!
Look at him. Everyone LOVES him! Sweet, gentle, and kind Gibbs. But...like his namesake from NCIS, he can take control in a heartbeat without blinking an eye! His mission was to escape and follow his fellow Partners in Crime down to the river for a swim on this hot day. Gibbs is not like his friends though; once he is out, he is a wanderer and before you know it he is miles away.
This week, I was inside cooking Chicken Divan for dinner which would slowly but surely, become Chicken Disgusting! Suddenly the dogs started to bark as though there were an unwelcome intruder entering our compound. So, thus the excitement begins... I go outside to see Gibbs strolling down our driveway and OUT of his fenced pasture! "Dang! " I exclaimed...well, it may have been somewhat harsher. I call him. "Gibbs, you come back here right now!" Gibbs is a supposed trained obedience and Therapy Dog. Not today. He gave me a look...and if he had fingers I most certainly know what they would have been doing. "Curses!", I said!
I am screaming in my loudest "Go Gamecocks" voice, "Get back here or I'm gonna beat your butt, Gibbs Miller!!!" Suddenly our neighbor, Danny arrives because he can hear me, and he knows that nothing good is going on at the farm when he hears this! So, off we go on his four-wheeler to look for Gibbs. No luck. We see paws though...very big paws so we know he has gone down to the river. Danny says, "you take the four-wheeler, and I will take my truck." Well, the problem is, I don't really know how to drive a four-wheeler. But not wanting to look stupid or afraid, I said, "OKAY!!!" So off I go!
About halfway down the LONG gravel road I run into one of my neighbors. (The one that loves dogs..thank God) He says, 'Where ya' goin', hot rod?" He's a funny guy, he is. He can actually tell that I absolutely know nothing about the vehicle that I am driving. I tell him that I am looking for Gibbs. He says, "Now Marianne, it is getting dark and you KNOW the boars come out this time of night!" I said, "Well, this will outrun them!" Well, he is a real boar hunter, and he just kind of laughed, and said, "Ha ha..yeah...can this thing go 40 mph?" "Heck, I can't even figure out how to get it to go past first gear!!!" He looked at me like, "Dumb chick...let's pray she doesn't run into one of those 350 pounders!!" So, off I go to find my dog that is in a lot of trouble!!! Well, about 1/4 mile down the trail I find a tree down. I say to myself, "OK, self, Danny says this thing will go over a tree...Let's get-er-done!" First I had to say a prayer that went something like this, "Dear God, you know I'm stupid for my animals. Please protect this dumb chick from any mishaps!" I go right over that tree! "Thank you, dear Lord!" Over the river and through the woods...hunting a dumb dog we go! (sing it now!) Finally I get to the end of the trail... 3 miles and no Gibbs! I pull up right behind my neighbors house...the ones that I am sure hate our dogs because they "thought" they were going to be out in the wilderness on our property, in the peace and quiet. "Oh no!!!" Actually it was a little more explicit in my tired mind. They were just getting home from work. Imagine having a difficult day performing surgery all day and coming home to find your crazy, animal-loving neighbor on your driveway driving a four-wheeler and screaming "Gibbs!!!!!" Needless to say, he didn't say a word and I am still embarrassed! I finally, totally worn out, arrive home and who do you think was waiting for me in the driveway soaking wet and looking at me like, "where ya' been?" Gibbs! Scoundrel!!! The four-wheeler no longer works, the fences are mended, the chicken is burned, and I am still embarrassed, but what else is new? Life on the farm.
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